It all started when I was young *rips up papers* 

No, when I was young *sighs* no, terrible beginning...I threw that scratch away across the room..

Ya, know when I was little  *draws squiggly across the sentence* *sighs in defeats*

I'm really not...good at beginnings as you can tell, but what I wanted to say was...

Ok, *nervous giggles* you see? I'm not really good with this kinda thing...

 Let's start of with something different...Ever since I was a child, I was what one would refer to as....lonely..you're probably wondering why was I was so lonely, and why as a child...Well, when you live the life that I lived..you would understand...

See, I grew up in a....performing household...yeah, that's the word for it "Performing"

I grew up on the road and stayed on the road as long as I can remember. 

I was raised up in eccentric, circumstances...and those eccentric circumstances were the circus...yes, you heard right the circus...

The circus was my habitat..my sanctuary, but it was also my prison...

But don't get me wrong, I love seeing People's smiling faces... and making them laugh...SEeeing the bliss in their eyes gave me nourishment...fed my soul...

But....after the curtains come down, I became lonely again..the thrill was gone...

But I guess, I shouldn't take my life for granted; I saw things that normal kids..people even would never get to see...I visit Africa, Brazil, any place you can think of, but I wanted to be normal.

I did get a chance to be normal when I met her... her warm, Ebony eyes, those lovely, ethereal features, and her luminous smile were some of the physical aspects I loved about her. The way she could make me laugh and cheer me up with cute, comical, somewhat relatbale stories...that girl had one helluva imagination *giggles* It's got me laughing just think about it. She told tose glorious stories in her cute Betty Boop voice. She was loved by many, woshipped even...She was my love, my circus girl...

Well, I guess I can continue about myself...but only a few of my personality traits...I was polite, people said I was too polite and friendly they said...I loved the world and the world seemed to love me, or  at least what I could give them, my image... 

Sometimes, the world was too much and I wanted to escape, but how could I? I was their entertainer...Sometimes I felt like the world prohibited me from being free, ironically, I was free when I performed for them...The world saw me as a clown, and I was a clown..I am Michael Jackson and this is my story...

JUNE 1st, 1984...

"Step right up!! Step right up!! To see the amazing lizard man, yes the man was raised by the king of all reptiles, THE KIMOTO DRAGON!!! HE WILL AMAZE YOU WITH HIS DIGESTION OF FIRE----

"Michael, hurry up and get dressed, are fans will be here!!" My little sister Janet shouted while racing to get her tricycle and batons...

"Oh, oh yeah..." I said dismissively, why peeping through the dingy and tattered curtain, watching ringleader Johnny announce Willis...Oh, excuse me Wilissssss...see? the trick is you have to emphasize the "s" like a snake, hence him being raised by reptiles, snakes...

I giggled at all the astonished countenances of the fans..If they only knew the truth about Willissss...but I'll save that story for another time...

"Michael, be ready in 2 minutes!! The fans will be here soon!!" My little sis nagged me...

I watched as the the crowd ooweed and awwed, and finally retreated from the curtain...

"Janet, we have enough time. Ringleader Johnny has to show Sheila Lee, Dandy Rudolph, Miny, Moxie, and Evie, and many others before they get to us...RingLeader Johnny is clearly saving the best for last." I said with much hubris...

She rolled her eyes..

"Yeah, but you take forever getting dressed.." She droned, putting on her clownish ballet flats...

"Janet, I do not take to long, and you know it..." I rolled my eyes and gibed...

She smirked...

"Oh, so you're going to lie, looking in the mirror and flapping you gums about your appearance..." She sighed...

"Gosh, I have never seen a man fuss about his appearance before...like some female, let me do that job!!! I'm the woman here!!!

Janet has always had a mouth on her, ever since she was little pup, her first words were: "Shut up Michael" Hehe , but I'm pretty sure they would've been instead of "cookie."

I smirked at her and giggled...

"Sure, Jan" She loathe that name, but that's why I did it...

She huffed and finished getting dressed.

Truth be told, I already was dressed. She's fussing about absolutely nothing....I just needed to put on my best clown shoes and my clown makeup, but everything was set...

*sighs* Ok, where are my clubs and squirt guns??? Aww, ok...I'm ready for---

Oh, I completely forgot about ya'll...well, I'm pretty sure you know my name Michael Jackson, I'm 24 years old now and have been proclaimed as the greatest entertainer in the world...yes, at 24..young huh? Well, I have an old soul, so...

And the nagging, pesky evil one was called Janet...She's the youngest of 9 kids...

So you can understand why she's sooo evil..*giggles* 

My family and I are preparing for our show...I'm a little ecstatic yet nervous...Nervous that I won't give my best, I want to do my best and be perfect at even the smallest things, being the perfectionist that I am...

"Michael!! Janet!! It's time!!" I heard my oldest sister Rebbie whispered...we raced towards the back of the circus tent...we were technically still inside though, but we tried to hurry, before the lights dimmed so we can get some leeway of where we were...

We rushed up and i heard RingLeader Johnny invite the fans into our tent and plitely to ask them to bei seated...

"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!! I GIVE YOU THE LAST, BUT CERTAINTLY NOT THE LEAST!!! THE JACKSON CLAN OF CLOWNS!!!"

I heard the clamor of audience "Woooed" and "AWWEd" ...

"Ok, everyone, it's showtime!!!" I heard my beautiful, sweet mother whisper to us...

The curtains were pulled and the show had begun...

The audience clapped once more and our routine began...

My mother and Joseph did theire waltz and tango routine, which was extremely captivating...They would pull other couples to dance with them and as soon as the music stopped, they would throw pies in their face...

The audience would scream and laugh...

and then my brothers: Jermaine, Tito, Jackie, Randy,and Marlon and sisters: Latoya and Rebbie did their routine and it was a mix of magic, blindfolding fire tricks, all sorts of tricks you would see at a magician show...

Janet routine was next..She was a trapieze artist and would balance on her nose or her toes..hence the pointy ballarina flats on beams or her little pink trike. SHE would also balacne spinning plates, disks on her nose...Janet was revered for that...

And there was me...Now, Ladies and Gentlemen, I will demonstrate why I'm highly regarded as the best entertainer...my routines were always....spontaneous, magical if you will...

I would balance on my nose on a chair, or a thin rope that I could easily fall and meet my untimely death, but I'm that good...

I would throw banana cream pies or swallow swords, swallow swords with fire, magic card tricks, you name it..I did it, but I never did them all at one time...

But the one thing I truly wanted to do, but was much toootimid for it...was to sing...

I was afraid of singing, I was afraid no one would like my voice, but I kept that secret to myself, and of course you guys, but *sighs* maybe one day, my cryptic ability will shine...in the meantime, throwing these pies at people were much fun and much amusing to me and to them...

THe audience loved it...The loved our routines, always did..and always will...

They gave us a standing ovation and screamed for an encore...Of course we did it, we wanted to give them what they want and that was a thrill...no, A THRILLER!!!

After th curtains came down, we headed back to our trailor,,,,we had three trailers...3 each to the a trailer..

So it was Janet, Myself, and Rebbie in one...

"Well, we did one helluva performance today!!" Rebbie huffed...

"Yeah, it was extremely fun!!" Janet clapped her hands together all giddy...

"Yeah, yeah, it was fun." I sighed...It was fun, but I still felt...lonely...

I just wanted someone to talk to, other than my family...a friend, but I guess that will only be a dream..I said looking at the luminous stars in the obscure heavens above...

"Hey, Mike...Miny, Evie, and Moxy are cooking good dinner...wanna come?" Janet asked before her and Rebbie left...

"Naw, I'll come later, you guys go on ahead." I said while still gazing at the stars...

"Ugh...you're such a dreamer." Janet laughed and closed the trailer door..

"Hello, Mister Dipper, we meet again." I said, while Janet's words still linger in my mind...

If only her words weren't true....

*sighs* Candace-Ayana, how will you submit your artwork if you keep rushing??" my father sneered...

"Daddy, I have to hurry, or I won't be elgible for the contest" I whined...

I was adding the finishing brush strokes...

"But I told you rough brush strokes makes the painting harsh, it has to be soft." He gibed...

I laughed at my father...

"Dadd,y I know what I'm doing...everoyne is doing the same soft brush stroke technique." I assured him..

He sighed..."Ok, if you say so."

"Thank you." I said clamly...

He rolled his eyes and walked into our kitchen...

*sighs* my father can be very difficult sometimes...I know he means well, but I know what I'm doing with my...We unfortunately never see eye to eye on my projects...

Yes, I'm greatful that Daddy has how you say...pass the torch to me...

Daddy has showed me to paint, clean my brushes, and develop my own style, even though...we didn't click with it...Daddy wanted me to use softer lines, but I liked that chiroscuro of Da Vinci and some of Monet's soft brush, globbish paintings, but I wanted to create my own style..I wanted to be the best at what I do...

*sighs* Daddy did scold me about painting...ever since I was 5 when I started it...

It never seemed like I did it right, until that one time I won first prize....

But my mother was always understanding, always comforting...

my beautiful, sweet mother Candace...Candace-Amina...yes, she named me after her,except my other name is Ayana...

In case you're wondering, yes, I still live with my parents, yes, I'm only 23 years old...*sighs* It's a long story...well, let's see I have social anxiety and I'm too afraid of the world, so I reside with my folks...The world can be cruel, ya know? 

Ok, let's see...I'm African-American; I have almond shaped eyes, even thought one eye is bigger than the other, enclosed around deep Ebony pupils, beauty marks on my chin, cheek,  above my right eyebrow, inside my right palm that kinda looks like a heart...and above my lip, Jet black tightly coiled hair, full lips, lots of piercings, no tattoos, I'm too scared for all that and I guess that's it...oh, and I paint.

"Candace-Ayana!!!"

I rolled my eyes and finished the finishing touches...

"I'm coming dad, I'm coming..."

I guess I will stop my story here and you can learn more about the Candace-Ayana tale, nect chapter  see ya...

"Michael, you finally made it!!!" I heard Miny shout and wave at me....

I smiled at her...Miny, Evie, and Moxy were my some of favorite people to converse with...ugh..if case you're wondering...Miny, Evie, and Moxy are....you know you heard someone say "conjoining twins." Well....Miny, Evie, and Moxie are...a head of the game...*giggles* Stil didn't get it? Well, they're conjoining triplets...They're the first conjoining triplets in the world...That's their whole...mystique...

I strolled over to the triplets...and their homecooking completely invaded my nostrils..

The aroma of smoked ham, gumbo, brocoli and cheese bread, sweet potato pie, and their famous banana cream pie...that I know Evie made just for me. 

"Hey, Miny, Evie, and Moxy.."

"And hello to you, Mike...I heard you did a amazing job." Miny said while fixing me a plate...

"oh, and don't forget your slice of pie, Mike." Evie said giving me a blue cermaic plate with my favorite confectionary in the world...

See? I told you all for me!!

I smiled and blushed at her compliment...

"Thanks, Miny..." i said while, she gave me the silver tray...

'Mike, we're serious...there's a reason why you're the best entertainer to date." Evie said with a wink...

Wow, they really all think that??? Well, I mean I been called that several times, but I try not to let it go to my head...well, not everytime...

I smiled warmly at the girls and went to a designated table...

I sat with Janet and Wilisss,Ms. Monae and Dr. Zork...

"Hey, guys."

"Mike, over here dude!!" I heard Wilissss shout...

I mosied my way over and sat adjacent to Willissss and Ms. Monae...

"Man, I heard you and the fam where rockin'." Willissss said with a mouth full of cricket soup...

Yeah, he really lives his name as the lizard man..Willissss tattooed his whole body with green scales, much like a lizard...He has many piercings, including his ears, nipples, stomach...a regular freakshow, but he loves it and so does the crowd.

"This soup is too good...wanna try some??" Willisss offered.

I saw Ms. Monae scrunched up her face...

"No, thank you..these finger sandwiches, will do just fine." She said while delicately  eating them...

hehe Ms. Monae is the dainty one out of us...shes' the trapieze artist, double jointed acrobat...She loves to wear dresses and is very vivid with her performances, clothers, you name it...

She always says:" The world wouldn't be the world if beauty never existed."

She's very poised, elegant, feminine, more than Latoya, I think, but that's why they're best friends...

I giggled at Ms. Monae's countenance; what she doesn't know is Willissss has the hugest crush on her..but I don't hwo that'll work...Two different souls..

"Michael, you've been awfully quiet, is something wrong?" Janet asked me softly...

I looked at her...and smiled...

"No, sis, why?"

She kept eyeing me life she didn't believe me...

"You sure, you've been awfully quiet...well, more quiet than normal..."

If she only knew...but I didn't want to worry her with my problems...

"No, sis...I'm just tired from our performance earlier." I picked apart the savory brocoli and cheese bread...

Janet kept staring at me, as if she was reading my mind...*sighs* I swear Janet is my twin, she always seems to know something's wrong..like some type of telekenetic power she uses on me...

She sighed and continued eating...

I'm glad she let it go.

Dinner went well and everyone crowded for fellowship and laughed and discussed our performances or whatever, after a while...We all called it a night and ent our separate ways into our trailers...

I went into my room and folded my arms..behind my head and started fantasizing about my life, mainly in the future...What would I still be doing? Would I still be performing or passing the torch to someone else??? Will I forever be lonely in my newfound fame???

I sighed...I don't know what the future will hold...maybe, I will talk with madame Zorra...I confided in her about my future and she seemed to always got it right...

She even predicted me being the biggest entertainer..I wonder what she said about a perennial lonliness and isolation??? I hope it fades...

"Aww, Ms. Tiller..I'm so happy you came, we've all been waiting..." I saw this Mr. Bryant, the red-haired, beady eye crook that he is...

I gave him my best smile...best smile, I mean fake...

"Ah, Bryant...the known con-artist.." I said..

He coughed...

"Ms. Tiller, now is not the tim---

"Oh, no?? It is the time to disclose to other artist of how you cheat them of their talent, just to sell their art as your own..and charge it."

Mr. Bryant, I will not give you my art for $1"

pfft..he doesn't know these art supplies do not come cheap...one canvas is $200.."

"I will not sell my art to you, so stop following me and find another dope." I said power walking away from him...

*sighs* No one appreciates art anymore...I put my heart and soul into my pieces, all for them to re-sale them?? And lie about the true artist???

Anywho, I set up my work in a designated, secluded spot..I tried to fins the right lighting..and this was perfect...I don't know..I feel when the lighting is just right, the art can really be captured..like you can focus more on what's going on...

I also like when my audience gaze at more than one focal point...that's what I try to do with my work..*sighs* but...idk...

"Candace-Ayana!!! Hurry, the judges are ready to vote and deliberate.." I heard my father roughly whisper...

I sigh and set it up...

"Ladies and gentleman, I present you one of my fabulous pieces that I've been working on for over a month...this piece is very near and dear to my heart...I hope you too can correlate this art to your own lives..." With that I snatched the white opaque sheet...

I give you family from above..."

I heard many "ooohs" and "awww" 

I hope their good responses...I really put myself into this...

You're probably wondering what I painted...

I painted my family and I in the park...do you remember that famous painting:

"Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jetta." Well, that's where I got my inspiration, except it was my father, mother, and I and my cute little collie, Roxy...

"Wow, the hues are work ver well."

"Very rough brush strokes, but I like it...it's different."

I was elated by the responses...

I saw the art critics view painting and making small talk with the other critics.

I was biting my nails and hyperventilating. I just pray that I get something from this...

The art critics, judges whatever you wanna call them, deliberate and the finally annouce their pick:

"On behalf of the Art Galaia..we are happy to declare.............

Candace-Ayana Tiller as our winner."

I had delayed reaction, but I screamed in excitement and mosied my way to retrieve my ribbon, and $500 dollars in cash...

I really didn'y think I was going to win...

I knew tha chick with the cubism inspired piece sculpture was going to win....

"Thank you." I said to each and every judge, as I shook their hands.

I saw my mommy and daddy clap for me, well, Mommy did...Daddy is very..aloof when it comes to showing emotions or rather sensivity..

"Im so proud of you, babygirl..." My mother hugged and kissed my cheek...

Thank you, mommy..." I said giggling...

I looked over to my father, he actually smiled at me...

"I'm very proud of you." He sternly said....

I nodded...."Thank you....See? daddy, I told you they would like the harsh brush strokes."

He smirked..."Yeah, but you got lucky."

I shook my head..."Daddy, it was more than luck." 

"Oh, Malik, can you be happy for this child one time??? She put her heart and soul into this...at least acknowledge that!!! My mother snapped...

It's no use, my father was one astute man..and it's his way, or the highway...

I honestly didn't want to ruin this archive-like moment, so Ioffered if we go to dinne, to clear the stale ambiance...

Lucky me, we did...It was great dinner, no "i told you so" and what I could've done better, daddy, was calm and more lively...

So, we ended this chapter with me winning the art show, daddy not being a jerk, and me still feeling....aloof, but why??? Well, I will conclude this and see ya soon...

"Rise and shine!! Up and at 'em!! my little performers, we have an extravagant day ahead of us!!! We will--

*yawns, Uh..Ringleader Johnny is quite the spring chicken, huh? Yeah, he does this every morning and I should be use to it, but I still love my sleep...I rolled over to the left side and glanced at my Mickey Mouse clock; it read: 8:30 a.m...

Ugh...too early, too early..."  I heard Janet whined...

I giggled...I sat on the side of my bed and rubbed my drowsy eyes...

"Alright, ya'll get dressed..you know we have a long day ahead of us!!" Rebbie droned, while putting on her earrings...her 14 karat gold emerald studs....

She wore those everyday...She called them her "shining hypnotist " *chuckles* 

She said when she wore them, all the attention would remain on her because the earrings shimmered like stars and hypnotized them to focus all their undivided attention on her....

Yeah, my sister is hilarious...

"Michael, hurry...you know how the Ringleader Johnny is about being punctual." Rebbie nagged me...

God, her and Janet I swear are twins...nag, nag, nag...

I rolled my eyes...

"Ok, Rebbie, I'm going; I'm going." I said shuffling my feat against the red velvet carpet...

2 hours past...

So, I just got finish with bit and walked over to the concession stands to grab a nachos, cotton candy, and a lemonade..hey, clowns gotta eat too!!

Of course, the locals recognized me and asked for my signature..I love seeing their smiles and looks of delight when they introduced themselves, especially the children...They were always intrigued by my talents and always wanted a hug or give me their wonderful drawings...just pure iinnocence...

The parents wanted a trinket, but not the children...

"Mr. clown, I drew this of you!!!"  Speak of the devil...

This beautiful gap toothed black girl  who looked about 5 gave me...

"I drew this because i wike yawr acht." She said with her lisp and childlike voice...

"Thank you, my dear." I smiled and took the precious drawing of hers...

She ran back to her mother and father and they waved, while strolling to the waterballon concession stand...

I smiled and looked down at the awaiting gift and saw a a a vivid and detailed painting of me, juggling, well, detailed ina child sense, but I really could make out the my countenance and wardrobe...

I smiled warmly at this lovely gesture....Wow, if she keeps practicing, she could really reward the world with her talents...this painting was very touching and very marvelous.... I took the lovely painting piece and tucked in the front of my pants.

Unfortunately, my blue and black clown pants had no pockets...

But back to my original thought, Dont' tell anyone, but Painting has always been a thing I jotted down on my bucket list, but *sighs* I would have to abandoned my specatacle of a life to achieve it...

Granted, there were artists that did face paint or cartoonish paintings of the locals, but no...hanging in the lviing room where you can gaze and gaze at the lines, the hues, the composition....WOOOO, sorry for tangent, but the arts is sooo....

Anywho, I walked all over the circus and tried to enjoy it and see it from a spectators persepctive...I went to the concessions and shot water into that hole or throw darts at balloons, I recieved alot of attention, while I was throwing those darts...I won this big purple plush bear for a woman, Hehe although, I peeped her husband giving me the side eye...I don' think he liked that very much, but it's in my heart to give, I always gave, but never recieved....

I recieved admiration from my fellow fans, but it just never seemed like enough..but maybe I'm being selfish and ungrateful....

"Baby, I made this cake for you." My mother said picking up the translucent purple glass cake platter and exposed the most luscious red velvet cake that you can imagine...My mama put her foot down with this...Maybe, I got my art adroitness from her because that was a work of art...

My mother and I were sitting around the kitchen table, rapping about the previous event. *sighs* Unfortunately, my father went upstairs and "rested"...I can't believe he's really still pissed about the my trying to develop my own art style..

I looked at my mother with wide eyes of elation...

"Mommy, you didn't have to make this cake for me..it was just a painting." I innocously.

"Candace-Ayana, I'm very proud of you!! You deserve it, baby." She said proudly.

I smiled at her and then looked down, fiddling with my fingers...

"What's wrong, Yani !!" I smiled at the nickname she had for me...

"Yani" was short for Ayana. It's funny how I got that nickname...anyhwo, back to my sulking...

"*sighs* Nothing, mommy" I said softly...

Who am I kidding; I was sad about my daddy...

"Is it your father?" She said bluntly...

I looked at her and gave her half-smile...

"I just thought he would be a little bit more.....proud of me." I said honestly...

She sighed and sat down next to me about to give me her best lecture...

She grabbed my hand and clasped in her warm, delicate palm...

"Honey, you know how your father is!!--

"I know he could've at least showed a sprinkle of joy. Mama, daddy is never satisfied with anything that I do." I claimed...

I looked down at our interwined fingers...

I shook my head and looked over to my left...

"I'm never going to be good enough." I inquired and stated...

"Baby, you know that's not true...your father is a very aloof man..." She said with a softer, comforting tone...

I sighed... Aloof is an understatement...

"He will come around; He loves you very much and is proud of you Yani.'

I looked in to her gentle glare...

"I promise... Now, let's get a slive of this decadence!! Girl, you know how much you love a red velvet cake...that was your first cake too, you've loved it ever sense..."
SHe laguhed, trying to lighten up the sullen ambiance...

I laughed at my mother....talk about bi-polar...

We grabbed a slice, well... slices of that bad boy and enjoyed my prize...

It was 15 minutes after midnight, when we went to bed...

I got under my cozy, Hello Kitty covers and reminsce about the previous events...

I did win the art show and recieved $500 dollars, but I still felt...I don't know how to elaborate, but...maybe I'm just being ungrateful...anywho, let me go to the world that never sleeeps...my mind and *yawn* think about *yawn*.....silence

"Candace-Ayana!!!" I heard my mother scream in my sleep *sighs* ugh...some dream.

"Candace-Ayana!!!" I heard the alarming voice get closer....

*yawns* I was still asleep, but I know that wouldn't  be ephemeral...

"Baby, get up...it's 11:00 in the morning" my mother said from the door.

"exactly...it's Saturday,therefore, I can sleep in." I said, snatching the pillows over my head.

"Yani, stop being stubborn and get up. I have a day planned out for us."

"What could it possibly be?" I said irked and groggy with the pillows over my head.

"The circus will be here later today, and I wanted to take you. You used to love the circus!! And I heard it was extraordinarily the best circus ever!!! She kept emphasizing, "but I also need to run some errands." And also the mall. She added.

"So why can't dad help you?" I gibed.

"Fix your tone, Yani. You're father is not fun to shop with." 

Shopping??? oh, now she's speaking my language...

"ok, mommy, I'll be ready in a few."

"that's my Yani, now get dressed!" She said while waking away.

"*Sighs* but I'm still sleepy"...I groaned.

So after lugging myself out my plush sanctuary for 20 minutes, I finally got dressed...I put on the prettiest baby doll floral dress..it was soooo gloriously beautiful, my thigh high buckled up chucks, red lipstick,  cat eye and we were gone...so we had to drop mommy's cable bill, light bills off in the drop box and went to the store..I hope she makes spaghetti or pork chops tonight and then we went to the mall...

Yes, the mall, a place where all your dreams/desires reside...filled with copious departments that answered and served those desires.... 

"Yani, let's split up, meet me at the food court at 1 ok?

"Yes, ma'am." I saluted my mother...

She chuckled at my goofiness and proceeded to walk where her little heart contend...I think I know where she's going...to the appliance store or somewhere with lots of mechanisms or makeup..my mother will spoil herself rotten with cosmetics...

Hmm.... Let's see where can I go first.

"Ok, gang we have arrived to Canterbury county for our show this evening, so I guess we can have a little fun, before then." Ringleader Johnny exclaimed.

We all cheered...wow, I can't remember the last time we stopped at a establishment of fun....but here we are at the mall..but before we did that..we went incognito. We wouldn't blow our cover to the locals...we kinda want to surprise our audience and keep ourselves a mystery..

Of course I'm the king of mystery, so I wore my a plaid button down shirt with suspenders and my clown shoes, except they weren't as festive...

"Ok, gang, I guess we can split up and meet at the food court. if I'm looking at the map correctly, the food court should be downstairs by a Spencer's gifts and Zaria's jewelry shop." Ringleader Johnny explained. We all said ok and headed our way to the various places.

Ok, let's see---

I heard my stomach growled and well, now I know where to go...I looked around to see if I saw something that can qualm my ravenous state...  mmhmm..what's that delightful aroma???? My nostrils led me to the Cinaminna...

mmmhh...it sure did smell Delicious...Ok, cinnaminna it is...I modded over there and saw a line, jeez, reminds me of the circus....I walked closer and stood behind someone. I hope this place taste as good as it smells..

"This line is hella long." I heard a sweet, feminine voice say behind me...

"*giggles* it sure is." I said turning around and I saw the most beautiful creature I've ever seen. She was a vision of loveliness. Her Chocolate Ebony eyes encased by her almond shaped Windows, her plump lips, beautiful chocolate skin, and coiled tendrils that cascaded down to her soft yet angled cheekbones....my God she was beautiful, no she was gorgeous...

"Ughm..hi." She giggled...

"Hi-h-h-hi" Cursed my bashfulness and clumsy ability to talk to women.

She giggled that saccharine laugh that was music to my ears. 

"Nice to meet you, I'm Candace-Ayana." 

She said with her dainty hand out for me to grab, and I delightfully did...

"My name is Mikel..." I said...I didn't want to disclose my name, it's against circus policy...remember that keeping mysterious for the audience???

"well, nice to meet you Mikel...it's a cute name."

"you're cute." I blurted..oops, no, no

She smiled that million dollar smile...I saw the blush creeped on her defined cheeks.

"Thank you, but you're the cute one here."

I think I'm in love ladies and gentlemen...

Wow, This beautiful creature said I was cute..wow, I thought she was cute..no, I thought she was beautiful...I couldn't stop staring at her  perfect visage, carved from the Angels of God...She was too lovely to look at. I saw her luscious lips curve into that wonderful smile of hers and laugh...

"ugh...Mikel, I think she's ready to ring you up." I heard the Angel say and point in front of me...I reluctantly steered my head and I saw this woman raising her eyebrow up at me...

"oh, sorry." i apologized. I went up to the alabaster counter and looked down and saw this clear display case of the cinnaminna's...Honestly, I wanted to buy them all..they had one's with pecans, brown sugar, pretzel cinnaminnas, chocolate chip, I was overwhelmed by the various deliciousness...

"Uh, sir...ready to order?" The woman asked, rather petulant...I examined her; she wasn't the prettiest woman, but she wasn't completely drab looking...Auburn hair, freckles, and a scowl that said:"Welcome to hell."

"How does the pecan one taste?" I asked ecstatically...

"Well, it's our most popular one...next to the pretzel one." She said a little warmer...

"Do you sell popcorn, cotton candy cinnaminna?"

She laughed..."Unfortunately, no, but that's not a bad idea." She sarcastically remarked...

"I'm sorry, this is my first time..ordering?"

"Well, come back when you know how to order...You're holding my line up." She said with that petulant tone...

I was offended by her attitude...

"hey, he's clearly new here...give him a break." I heard my Angel say behind me...

I turned around and saw her pretty eyes with so much fire in them.

"It's ok, Mikel, I can order it...what do you want?" She asked not taking her eyes from my newfound enemy...

"Ugh...I'll try....the...pretzel one." I said softly...

"Get one pretzel and one pecan cinnaminna...please." Her voice was harsh on the "Please"

The dragon woman was glaring at my Angel, and I was getting very heated...

"As a matter of fact, My Angel I would like to buy ALL OF THEM!!" I smirked at the cahsier...

I saw her glare shifted into a frown which morphed into her mouth agape...

I heard my Angel laugh...

"Well, Mr. Mikel, I would be delighted to order all that." She said with a wink...

I swear my heart missed a beat when she did that.

"One of everything...please." She ordered and pulled out her little purse to pay for it..

"No, my Angel, I got it." I insisted..

"No, Mikel, really..it's fine--

"No, a man always pays...you're lady; I will pay and that's that." I demanded...

I pulled out my wad of cash...The best thing about being a circus performer, you get to keep your earnings...well, of course taxes, but for the most part...I kept my money...Although, I hate to gloat about my income and how much I make.

"Ok, big spender." My Angel exclaimed...I looked at her from the side and she cocked an eyebrow...

I gave her my charming smile and paid for our confectioneries, and we walked off...

"Woah, I like how you handle that." My angel chuckled...

I laughed as well; we made it to this oak round table next to the Cinnaminna...

"Oh, well, she was very rude to me; I just wanted to give her a taste of her own medicine."

"And she deserved it." My Angel added, while folding her arms...

I looked at her and smiled. I placed the trays on the table and pulled out her chair...

"Oh, no..you don't have to pull out my chair." She said, embarrassingly...

"I'm a gentleman...it's my duty, besides, it's the least I can do fo saving me the humiliation." She dainty sat down..

"No, no, you're new here...It's the least I can do." She said with a smile.

"You've done enough." I said while sitting close beside her..

"Oh yeah?'

"yeah."

"What I do?" She said looking at me, while biting her cinnaminna...

"....just simply...talking to me." I said deeply and scrutinizing the creamy iced covered pretzel, which was cooked to perfection.

She looked up while chewing... She swallowed and pursed her sweet lips to say something...

"I understand." She finally mumbled...

We both looked up and our eyes met....I just couldn't peel my orbs from hers...The world could've literally disintegrated, and I wouldn't care. This moment we both shared was simply magical...she really took my breathe away with her ethereal beauty...

I saw her divert her attention down to her lap and blush...WOw, she's really shy..like me :)

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to embarrass you."

"Oh, no..you didn't embarrass me...I was actually...charmed. If it makes you feel better, I was checking you out too." She added with a coy smile.

I smirked at her...Oh, I really like her...

"Well, Mikel...*giggles* Are you really going to eat all that." She burst out in laughter.

I looked down at my tray...*sighs* I guess I bit off more than I could chew...

So my Angel and I ordered some Styrofoam trays, as well as bags from the cinnaminna shop, and I put all the cinnaminnas in them and she helped me carry them. We were now walking around the mall and she was telling me a little bit about herself...well, she still had her guard up, but I hope she'll let it down eventually. 

"So, Mikel, would you like to go to HOT TOPIC???"

"WHat's a HOT TOPIC??"

She giggled "You know, a store with alternative clothes for goth, emo people."

"Emo???NEver heard of him."

She smiled and giggled again...

"That's cute."

I smiled nervously...

"Have you been to...Spencer's gift?"

"No--- wait!!!, gifts? I love gifts!!!"

She giggled..."me too, let's go; you're going to love it."

She pulled my hand and raced to this Spencer's gifts...

We finally made it to this cryptic department, and it was really bizarre...even for me...the clown...

It was a lot of obscure decorations...lights, and spiky hair, pierced, tattoo people...

Candace-Ayana lugged me in, and we began searching and looking at the nick-knacks..there was jewelry, clothes, and other spontaneous items...

"Welcome to SPencer's Gifts, where all the weirdos come and get their thrill..." This blonde haired spiky, haird scruffy dude annnounced, in a shrill voice...

He smirked seeing Candace and me...

"And for couples, we have a erotic section." I jumped at his comment...

And I think Candace felt the same way because when I looked over, she began blushing...

He chuckled..."Happy shopping."

"Ugh...I can assure you Mikel, we're not going back there." 

I sighed in relief...thank God...not my type of thing...

We browsed all around the store, and I saw Candace looking at the jewelry;I could't help but look at her. As a matter of fact I was checking her out. My eyes trailed down to her lovely curves and shape...I mean; I'm a man, but I felt like I disrespected her...So I shook my thoughts away...

"She's cute huh?" I recognized the voice of the scruffy guy.

"Oh, yeah, she's beautiful..." I stuttered and blushing...

He smirked evilly..."You like her, don't you, man...is she your girl?"

I blushed...I wouldn't mind if she was though...

"No, she's my friend.."

"Dude, she's hot... I wouldn't mind showing her a trick or two." he bluntly said, while casting his eyes all over her body, basically undressing her with his eyes.

Ok, he infuriated me...how disrespectful!!!

"She's not a common slut, you love and leave." I said out loud...

I looked around and saw that the people in the store were gazing at us, including Candace-Ayana...

He smirked at me again..."Well, the erotic section is still....calling for you----

I don't know what came over me, but I punched him...

I heard the customers gasp, and I looked up...and saw Ayana's hands conceal her mouth...

"C'mon Ayana, we're leaving..." I demanded and grabbed her hand...

I don't know what came over me; I'm not a violent man, but that guy making lewd, sexual remarks about Ayana...really....ticked me off.

Ayana and I rushed out...God, I'm sure I'm in trouble..I did just assault someone...We rushed inside the elevator to get away from the scene..I know Ayana was confused..then she asked me..

"Mikel, what was that all about?"  

"*sighs* I'm sorry Candace-Ayana." I simply said..with that the elevator dropped to the lower level and I rushed out of there...

"Mikel, whatever it was, I'm sure it was valid." She said racing beside me...

"It was." I said deeply...

"Ok, do you want to talk about it???" She pressured.

I looked into her amazing Ebony eyes and couldn't bear to tell her...hey, the clerk was a pervert, so I punched him...

"Ayana, it's best if you don't know..." I simply stated.

"But, I mean witnesses will claim that you assaulted him with probable cause---

"Ayana, he made some nasty, sleepy comments about you...about us, so I punched him."

She looked at me with shock..."Wow, I guess that was valid, but---

"We will cross that bridge when we come to it." I knew some repercussions would ensue, but right now...I just wanted to spend some quality time with this gorgeous woman...and any case, it was self-defense..

"Ok, well, let's go to Rocko's fun hats." She suggested...

I turned around and saw those pretty eyes shimmer...

I half-smiled...

"Ok." 

She beamed and led the way this time...

We went to Rocko's hat and they really had the most festive hats you could imagine...Ayana bought these cute cat ears with these gorgeous faux pink flowers and pearls on them...I thought she looked adorable...

I unfortunately, couldn't keep my mind on the hats..I was still a little angry about the Spencer's gifts..ugh..altercation...

She bought three hats, but my mind was too occupied to even focus and peek at what she bought.

"Thank you." She said to the clerk and we walked out...

"Oh, wait Michael..I bought you this hat." She said searching in her pink plastic bag...

She pulled out a cute red clown top hat ..it was striped red and black..it had this little detachable spinning wheel on it to.

"I bought you this...I don't know, something was whispering to me to get it for you." She said giving it to me...

I was really flattered by her kind gesture...A smile pierced on my countenance...

"Ayana, you didn't have to get this for me.." I shrugged.

"I wanted to. You're really kind, sweet, and different, Mikel and I wanted to cheer you up."

I looked into her beautiful orbs and I don't know what took over me, but I hugged her...

"Thank you, sweet girl." I said...

I had to do something for her, now. SHe's been nothing, but amiable towards me. She definitely deserves it...Oh, I saw that Zaria's jewelry store...I know exactly what to get her...

I pulled Ayana's hand and we rushed towards the Zaria's jewelry store...

It was very...shimmering...I swear the store looked and was shaped like a diamond..

"Welcome to Zaria's where love began and never ends." The perky clerk exclaimed...

That was a little corny, but she's trying...

"Thank you." We both said...

"Mikel, what are we doing here?" 

I smiled at her...

"oh, it's a surprise..." I said...I wanted to find Ayana the most beautiful necklace or ring I could find...

"Ok, well, I'm going to look at some of the jewelry...Maybe I can get my mother something."

"Hi, sir, may I help you." The perky woman asked..

"Yes..I wanted--- I looked around to make sure Ayana wasn't near...

I lowered my tone...

"I wanted to buy something special for--

"Aww, your girlfriend..." THe enthusiastic Emily chimed...

"Well, she's not my gir--

"Fiancee? Oh, how sweet..." She chirped..

"no, she's my friend, and it's a thank you---

"A thank you for being my best friend jewelry."

Ya know, I'll just let her talk...

"Well, i have the perfect thing for that." She strolled to the other side of her...

I sauntered as well..

"What about this beautiful precious topaz colored diamond...ya know what they say, I diamond is a girl's best friend." I looked at the diamond ring; it was beautiful but it didn't scream "buy me."

"ughm...no..I was thinking more about a necklace.."

"oh, well,--she turned to the shelf of necklaces...they were all beautiful, but none capture my eye...until I saw this pink diamond in the shape of a heart with a Hello Kitty diamond pendant next to it...that was the winner...

"I'll ge that one." I exclaimed...

She pointed and smiled...

"Awwww, excellent choice. I must say you have exquisite taste, young man." She said grabbing the necklace, delicately...

"Thank you."

"She's going to love it." She smiled...

I hope so...I hope so...

She placed it in a beautiful pink silk box and tucked it in this white shopping bag.

"Thank you for shopping at Zaria..Come back soon."

I warmly smiled and didn't see Ayana...

"Ayana?" I looked around and then I saw her sitting on a bench, gazing at the ambiance around her.

"Ayana?" I came towards her.. She snapped out of her reverie and beamed.

"Oh, hey Mikel...yeah, that jewelry was too expensive for me..I would have to sell my kidney and brain for them gems."

I chuckled at her comment..

"What's in the bag?" She inquired, while pointing at it..

"oh, it's a gift...for you."

She looked up at me wide eyed...

"For me?"

"mhmm."

"Oh, Mikel, you didn't have to get me--

"But I wanted to." I interjected...

I pulled out the rectangular box and gave it to her...

She gently grabbed it and opened it and she gasped...

"Oh my---How much was this??"

"Ayana, that doesn't matter..what matters that you liked it??"

She looked at me teary eyed...

Uh oh, I admit I'm not good with women...

"Mikel, I loved it..." She sniffled..."This is beautiful. How did you know I love Hello Kitty?"

I smirked..."A little,chirpy bird told me."

"Ayana, I want to put it around your neck." i said sitting beside her..

I pulled her lovely hair to the right and place the beautiful necklace around her neck...

"Thank you, Mikel. Thank you so much" Ayana hugged me tightly..

"No, Ayana, I wanted to..I really wanted to."

We looked into each other's eyes...I swear this woman's eyes are going to give me a heart attack...

"MICHAEL!!!!" I heard this shriek...

Uh oh...It's the demon spawn herself, Janet...

"Michael!!!" I heard a shrill voice scream....Oh no, the little demon Janet..

Great, she could really blow my cover..I can't have my disguise disclose just yet...

I need to think of something quick...

I turned to Ayana and grabbed her shoulders...

"Ayana, listen, I have to go."

"Wait? Go? Is everything alright." She asked with perplexity and concern in her eyes...

I smiled at her compassion...

"No, my...little...dog is SICK!!" I said.

She raised an eyebrow...Oh no, my lie is too incredulous...

"Oh, ok..." She said softly...I can hear the sadness in her glorious voice.

"Wait? at least give me your number.." Ayana pleaded..

Well this is a problem because I don't have a cell phone..

"Ayana, how about you give me your number." I suggested instead.

She was surprised and smiled charmingly

"Ok." She scrummaged through her purse to find a pen and paper..

She finally did and wrote those precious numbers...

I took the note and heard Janet calling for me getting closer and closer...

*sighs* Must she ruin everything? 

I got up and raced---wait? I forgot something...

I turned around and pulled Ayana in for a hug and kissed her on her flawless cheek.

"THank you for the hat!!" I screamed, while running towards Janet...

I didn't even get a chance to look at her reaction, but I hope she enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed locking my lips to her skin.

I raced to the sweet shrills of my obnoxious sister...

"Michael" I saw Janet calling out, standing in the middle of mall, while the onlookers gave her confused or amused looks..

"Janet, Janet..I'm here." I said little quieter...

"Michael!!!!" Janet beamed with her smile like mothers' and rushed towards me, gretting me with a hug...

"Big brother, hi."

I looked at her like she was crazy..."Big brother? Hi?" She greeted me like we were separated for 15 years...

"Michael, I'm sorry, but Ringleader Johnny wanted me to go and get you..we're leaving now." Janet told me...

I rolled my eyes...I really wanted to spend more quality time with Ayana...the connection we shared...I never had this attraction to anyone before..Gosh, I've know her for only an hour, but...something about her, being near her feels euphoric.

I saw some dingy fingers snap in my face..

"Applehead, are you with me?"

"Huh? What?" I said snapping out of my reverie..

" I said are you alright? What's going on in that dumb head of yours?" Janet said with a cocked eyebrow and smirk.

"Nothing, spawn of satan, nothing..."

She stuck her tongue at me...

I rolled my eyes and we proceeded to walk down to the food court....God, give me a miracle to see Ayana again...

 my hand was still pressed upon the spot, where Mikel kissed me at, and I still retained this wide grin on my face, like the Chesire cat... Wow, the kiss wasn't intimate, but it really took my breathe away---Oh, snap..I have to meet my mother at the food court..Let me go down to this elevator...Wow, I feel soo...elated.

I don't know my heart is fluttering and I don't know why...I've only know the guy for what...30 minutes??? ANd he already got my heart thumping??

Pfft..Naw, BEing enthralled by his ethereal looks is one thing. But love at first sight??? NAWWWW *giggles*

I finally stepped off the elevator and headed towards the food court...I started fiddling with the pendants...Wow, this was the most beautiful gift, I have ever received. 

I finally made it to food court and didn't see my mother nowhere...*sighs* I guess I'll sit at one of these booths and think about...my mystery friend with the gorgeous Ebony eyes.

"Michael, glad you can join us." Ringleader Johnny exclaimed with his hands up...

I saw a few onlookers look at Johnny like he was weird.

I looked around and gave them a nervous smile...

"Ringleader, we have to keep it discreet..we're amongst normies." I said softly...

He giggled..."Sorry, Michael...but you know my loud voice is my shtick." He announced...

It is, but we're in the normal world...so we have to try to blend in with everyone else.

"Where is the rest of the crew?" I inquired, looking around.

"Your family is On the bus and Ms. Monae is ordering a sushi bowl..

"Speaking of which, I'm going to go to ZZaro's pizza..you guys want anything?'

"Oooh, I want a burger and milkshake." Janet said rubbing her hands together..

I giggled and looked around and saw *gasps* My angel Ayana...

I smiled this toothy grin...Wow, God heard my prayers...

"Michael, are you coming?" I heard the little demon called out..

"Yeah, Yeah.." i said still looking over at Ayana...

I saunter over to Bill's Burgers with Janet and discreetly I would glance over at Ayana every now and again... I realy wanted to go speak to her...I had this brilliant idea..

"Janet, I have to go to the bathroom..just order for me a double bacon burger and sweet potato fries.." I said walking away, rushing to get to my beauty.

"Ok..." I heard her say confused..

Great, now is my chance...

Candace-Ayana POV

*sighs* I was still fiddling with the precious necklace Mikel given me, while I wait for mommy dearest. God, this was such a beautiful gesture. I will cherish this moment forever. I subconsciously smiled as I twirled my dainty finger around the chain and pendants. I was also thinking about my Knight in shining suspenders. *dreamingly sighs* Suddenly, I felt everything go pitch black; somebody concealed my eyes. 

"Oooh" I squealed. i heard this sweet chuckling...

"Guess who?" This deep voice say in my ear. This warm breathe tickled my ear and gave me goosebumps. I knew who the character was, but I played along with his game.

"UGhmmm...Freddy Kreugar?"

I heard the lovely laugh..."NO."

"hmmm....Jason Vorhees."

He let out a hardy gaffawed "No."

"I'll give you a hint, it's your favorite peson." He said deeply and seductively.

I bit my  lip.."Hmm...favorite person huh?"

"Yes, my lovely lady." I can fell my heart thumping and cheeks burn.

"Hmmm...Mikel?"

He released his tender, soft masculine hands from my eyes and I had to blink a couple times to correct my distorted vision. I turned around and saw the most beautiful visage you could ever imagine.

Mikel held this gorgeous smile, baring those pearly whites.

His smile was infectious that it made me smile..

"Mikel, what are you doing here?' I thought you had to take care of your dog or something?" I questioned...

I saw his smile dissipate, as I mentioned his tale about a dog or sister...

He licked his lips and said.." Oh, well, I meant I have a little sister and she's  a dog....you should see her fangs...scary stuff."

Whet? I didn't get that, like his dog was adopted? OOOh, oh *laughs* He just made a joke...

I snorted and burst out laughing...

"Mikel, that's funny...you made a joke." I chuckled.

He gave me that one million dollar smile again.

"Ayana, are you hungry?" he asked...Mikel is the sweetest...

I smiled..."ughmm..a little bit, I--- He dashed out of sight.

"Wait, I didn't tell ya--- I shouted and stopped in mid sentence...well, it's the thought that counts, right?

Before I can recollect my thoughts, Mikel had returned faster than the spped of light...with a burger meal. It was comprised of a double-bacon burger with lettuce, tomato, cheese, pickles, and yellow and red onions that was peeping from inside the burger. a large sweet tea, and sweet potato fries, saturated with ciinamon and brown sugar. 

"Oh, wow, Mikel, thank you." I said, while my eyes danced around the feast.

He sat down beside me. I had diverted my eyes from the meal, to look at him, and he smiled at me.

His smile and eyes always intimidate me...especially his eyes...They always held so much intensity in them, like he was looking through my soul.

I looked down feeling self-conscious.

"Ughm..Mikel, do you want to share with me?" 

"i would love to." He said picking up a sweet potato fry and brigning it to my lips...

"Oh, sorry, I don't let men feed me on the first date." I chuckled.

"Well, I wouldn't consider this a date...a date should be in a more romantic setting. The ambiance of being with the one you love, should make your heart sing and dance. The butterflies in your tummy should always flutter eratically, and your souls should be yearning for each other. The mood should be more...amorous, if you will."

I was just lingering on to every word...It was like hypnosis...Evey word was poetic, so sensational.

"Wow, your diction was just right." I whisper...

That was an understatement, the boy had me hooked...

He smiled at me and picked up my chin

"I can give you the best date in the world." He said deeply.

I was blushing from his words..

"Mikel, you seem to have the right words and know eaxtly what to say, to make a girl feel all giddy and toasty inside." i said softly...

He looked down and sigh...

"Well,  I have a confession to make...I'm really a bashful man...I looked to magazines, Film noir type movies to understand the woman's sensibility and psyche." He professed.

"Wow, well, whatever you did...It worked on me."

"Really?"

"Hooked line and sinker." I said honsetly.

He smiled at me...and fed me the fry...I let him slide this time...

"Candace-Ayana!!" Honey, I just found the cutest dress for you for the cir---

Miy mother stopped in mid-snetence, as she walked over to my booth...

I saw this smirk pierced on her face...

"Well, Ayama, I can see you picked yourself a fine gift." She said while folding her arms, holding that same smirk.

Well, the gift is more than fine, if you ask me :)