[Report This]Date: Jan 03, 2014 12:18 am Title: Chapter 2
I know this story!!! It's based off one of my favorite movie!!! Love this story already XD
[Report This]Date: Jan 01, 2014 02:30 pm Title: Chapter 3
Good chapter! Just make sure you watch for sentence fragments; it makes it kind of hard to follow what you're trying to convey. It'd also be nice if you could elaborate on who all of these characters are; you're kind of in the habit of introducing all these characters without any background.
you update really fast though, I'm impressed. Keep up the good work!
Ps. I read your response, you just made my day. I'm so glad you like my stories ^.^
[Report This]Date: Dec 29, 2013 10:18 am Title: Chapter 2
Great chapter (you're going to be sick of me saying that soon, but what else is there to say?); love the dialogue.
It's going great; you fixed the tense problem, but now it's the subject verb agreement (and I don't think I'm using the right term, but it's hard to explain otherwise. English is so confusing, isn't it.)
Since you're keeping the story in present tense, it should be "I cough." When it's the narrator speaking, you don't need to add an 's' after every action.
I starts to put it down on the table and Beeman quickly pulls the frayed rag away.
You can take out the 's' for Michael's action--I start to put it down--but keep beemans action the same. For other people, the 's' remains.
I don't know the actual terms or how to explain it correctly, but I hope it makes sense to you xP.
Author's Response:
Honestly, I'm so honored for your kind support, Jenna. Because you're one of the great author in this site and your stories, WOW..just WOW. I'm crazy about them especially for the truth, the purity. TQ for the correction :^)
[Report This]Date: Dec 28, 2013 08:33 am Title: Chapter 1
I friggin love this already. Go ON! :D
Author's Response:
Thank you for your time to read the story and gave the review. I really appreciate it. Happy reading
[Report This]Date: Dec 28, 2013 07:52 am Title: Chapter 1
It's an interesting concept, although the chapter ended rather abruptly, even for a prologue. Make sure you stay in one tense, too; you jumped from present to past tense, and back again.
But like I said, interesting story, I'll be watching its progression :)
Author's Response:
TQ so much for your kind support and you put a very nice input for my grammar, I really appreciate it. Happy Reading
[Report This]Date: Dec 28, 2013 06:41 am Title: Chapter 1
This story's pretty okay! :-). I'd like it alot better if there was more back story as to Michael and why the girlwas getting en excorcism. But I suppose that's stuff that'll come up later. Also, make sure you skim over your stuff in case of errors of spelling and jazz like that. But you're off to a good start! ^_^
Author's Response:
TQ, for your warmest correcting some of my errors spelling, fool me :). But I really appreciate it very much for your review.
Happy Reading