It was one early afternoon when the regulars were getting ready for tomorrow's competition. The sun outside gleamed brightly so that streams of light shot through the windows, casting blocks of bright gold on the ground. Outside, the trees swayed in the breeze while birds flew to-and-fro between them. The school grounds looked as common as they had always been, with scattered students walking around or sitting under the cooling shade of a large tree. Everything was so peaceful outside, contrasting with what was going on inside the girls' locker room…
"Happy Weekaversary, Alex!"
"Congratulations, Lexi!"
"Hey, Lex! Happy Anniversary!"
"Way to go, Lex!"
Shouts and hollers continued to come from the girls minus some of the others who didn't care much for Alex's relationship with Leonce and figured that a simple nod was enough for Alex to understand. Needless to say, it was Alex's one week anniversary with Leonce. It hadn't taken long for Leonce to realize his affections for Alex but Alex herself was still trying to figure out whether or not she wanted to be with him in that way.
To be honest, their relationship was pretty awkward.
With the constant handholding, tight hugging, deep kisses, Alex had grown to hate it even though she enjoyed being around Leonce. He treated her with so much affection and love that it was almost too much for her. It wasn't as if she didn't enjoy having someone touch her in such a tender way but whenever his fingers intertwined with her own, whenever his arms slipped around her waist, whenever his lips brushed against hers, she couldn't help but paint a mental image of someone else expressing their love through their actions just the same as Leonce.
It wasn't as if it weren't normal to use her imagination in that context. Most girls in the school imagined that their boyfriends were celebrities so what would be wrong pretending to be with someone who she actually had a chance being with?
After everyone had said their congratulations to Alex (who had just whispered a small 'thank you' to each of them in return) the girls set out for practice early. Only Riley, Nikki and Alex was left in the locker room.
"You don't seem all too thrilled about the anniversary," Riley remarked as she swept her hair back into a tight bun.
"What do you mean?" Alex asked quizzically as she too pulled her hair back.
"You aren't happy about it," she replied matter-of-factly.
As Alex slipped her hair into a scrunchie, she gave Riley a look that read 'Who do you think you're talking to?'. Riley was oblivious to the hardening scowl but Nikki almost instantly noticed and frantically waved her hands to indicate Alex to hold her tongue.
"That's not what she meant!"
Alex crossed her arms over her chest, "Then what did she mean?"
"She just meant to say that you don't look happy with the relationship, I mean, the anniversary," Nikki paused briefly, "You don't look as happy with Leonce than you were with-?!"
"Michael," Riley interjected and they both whipped their heads around to face her, "You don't like Leonce as more than a friend. You aren't happy with Leonce. You don't like the relationship you're in with him. You don't want him in that way. You want Michael. You like him. Not Leonce." The way that Riley had said this to her sounded as if she were telling her how she felt instead of voicing out her own opinion (Leave it to Riley to make you realize just how stupid you are).
Alex drawled in a shaky breath and heaved a sigh, "I know."
Nikki gasped in surprise and Riley's eyes flew wide open in shock.
She knew?!
"You know?" Nikki inquired.
"I know," Alex confirmed with a nod, "I've been knowing for a long time actually. But I've been trying to hide it by denying it." She shrugged, "Guess there's no more denying now."
There was silence.
"So, are you gonna tell him?" Riley asked.
"No."
"No!" Nikki exclaimed.
"Why not?" Riley asked.
Alex sighed, "It would be better if I'm with Leonce. He knows how to treat people right. He doesn't hurt others intentionally. He's a really sweet guy and Michael's... not."
"But you're the one for him," Nikki said.
"But he's not the one for me," Alex shot back, spewing just enough venom to silence the both of them.
The silence in the room was broken by the sound of Alex sighing.
"I'll see you guys on the field," she said and she jogged out of the room to go join the others.
Nikki and Riley both stood there in silence, neither of them wanting or attempting to speak to the other. As if on cue, they both turned to look at each other with a look that could only mean that they were thinking the same thing.
"She's stubborn."
Coach Anderson made sure to notice Alex as she made her way up the small hill to the track from the back of the school. Although still pale, she didn't seem as tired as that morning.
The team dropped their water bottles onto the track and immediately took off running the mandatory warmup of two-hundred meters. As they ran, Coach Anderson ran her eyes over different members of the team. Riley and Nikki were in the lead at the moment, running side-by-side and indulging in a casual conversation unrelated to track. Skye and Sierra were running behind them, followed by Keri, Olive, and Verona. Alex was at the end of line…when she should have been just behind Riley and Nikki.
Coach Anderson was tempted to pull Alex out for the day and insist on that she skipped practice, but she decided to wait a bit more and let Alex decide for herself if she shouldn't be running today. It was hard to tell if Alex was just picking a slow pace because she wasn't feeling well, or if she took a slow pace because she wasn't healthy enough to run any faster. Coach hoped it was intentional.
As the team waddled back to the bleachers for a quick stretch before taking individual training time, Coach Anderson glanced at Alex again. The girl seemed alright, a bit tired, but she didn't seem un-balanced or especially sick. The assistant coach turned his attention to the rest of the team, reading off announcements left over from the meet last weekend and training exercises for the sprinters, middle-distance runners.
Halfway through the practice as Coach Ronald was going over the head coach's notes, a shout caught his attention. Sierra was calling his name and pointing towards the other end of the bleachers, where Alex was bending over a trash can, heaving. Coach Anderson could see Leonce immediately leave his section of the track to see if Alex was alright. After making sure everyone else was doing what they were assigned, Coach Anderson hurried over to Alex who was currently wiping her mouth with her right hand, her left hand clutching the rim of the garbage can. The coach put a hand on the girl's shoulder, making her jump in surprise.
"Are you okay?" Coach Anderson asked, concern apparent in her voice.
"Really dizzy… My head hurts too," Alex gasped, still holding onto the trashcan for balance.
"Kneel down on the grass and lower you head," Coach Anderson commanded, supporting Alex until she was in the requested position. "Breath deeply, keep your eyes closed…" Coach Anderson reminded softly, sitting on the ground beside the sick teen. After about a minute, Alex looked up.
"Thanks. My head feels a little better now," she said.
"How's your vision?" Coach Anderson asked, wondering if the dizzy-spell had worn off completely.
"I can see fine," Alex answered.
"Good. Come on, I'm going to take you to the nurse, Alex," Coach Anderson said gently pulling her up to her feet, but keeping a hand under the teen's elbow.
"No, I'll be fine. I should come today anyway… I skipped practiced the other day. I should make it up," Alex protested, trying to pull her elbow out of Coach Anderson's grip. She only tightened her fingers around the joint, shaking her head.
"Alex, I'm taking you to the nurse. Don't argue with me," she said firmly. "Your parents will understand, and if they don't, I will make them understand. The only way you will be 'fine', is if you take a day to rest up, otherwise, you won't even be going to the next meet," Coach Anderson looked up. "Sierra! Take over for a bit, my clipboard's on the bleachers if you need to look at it. I'm going to run Alex to the nurse." She could see the raven-head salute her, and a few other kids waved goodbye to Alex before turning to the girl by her side and walking off.
Alex was tripping and stumbling on the way to the car so much, Coach Anderson had to wonder if she was still dizzy.
"When's the last time you ate something?" Alex fell silent, "You have been eating, haven't you?"
"Well..." Alex started.
"Alex."
"I hadn't eaten anything in awhile..." Alex said looking down at the ground.
"Have you been drinking anything? Water? Juice? Soda?" She felt Alex tense in her grip for a moment.
"No, not really," she stammered, "I've been avoiding food and water because I've been gaining weight lately. But I'm fine, really."
"Alex, avoiding nutrition won't help you lose weight. All it does is make you look like a walking skeleton."
"I know but..."
It's better than looking like a sumo wrestler...
"Look, Alex, there is no reason to make yourself look anorexic. You need water to live and you need food to stay healthy. Reducing yourself to no nutrition won't do you any good."
"Sorry, coach..."
"It's alright, Alex. Just eat something decent when you get home."
Alex nodded at her in agreement, "Yes ma'am."
"Why are you even starving yourself anyway?" Coach Anderson asked, "You have a great figure. What's making you want to be even skinnier?"
So I can look good enough to be with Leonce...
"Just wanting more attention, I guess..." Alex said quietly.
"You know, Michael would accept you no matter how you looked," Alex's head perked up in surprise, "He doesn't have expectations he would want you to live up to. He just wants you."
Alex glanced down at the ground, He doesn't want me in that way. He doesn't care. He's one of the main reasons why I became dissatisfied with my weight.
Knowing that Alex wasn't going to respond, Coach Anderson signed in defeat, "Alright then. Don't forget what I said; Eat something decent when you get home. I don't want you passing out at the competition tomorrow."
Alex nodded, "Yes ma'am."
The loud, obnoxious ring of the bell signaled all attenders of the school that it was dismissal and all of the students scrambled up from their creaking seats out of anticipation to the weekend. Slowly gathering her belongings, Alex leisurely started towards the door that was blocked by a tide of bodies scurrying out of the room, their shoes making dull shuffles against the floor. With her messenger bag clutched tightly in her hand, she sauntered out into the hallway, halting abruptly once she found Leonce waiting for her to come out by the wall across from her.
She smiled faintly, "Oh. Hey."
"Hello," he greeted back with a faint smile of his own.
A wave of silence washed in between them.
"I was wondering..." Leonce trailed off, anxiously biting down on his lip to keep it from trembling.
"Yes?" she questioned, quirking an arched brow.
"If you and me can go on a date."
Alex forced a tiny smile, Another one? I really don't feel like being with him right now... Maybe I'll feel like it later.
"If you wanna-?!"
"I do!" he interjected elatedly with a desperate look in his eye and she jolted at his sudden enthusiasm. In the end, she giggled and he blushed.
"Okay. It's a date then." It took everything in Leonce's body to keep him from breaking into flips.
"Great. I'll meet you at Maitre'd tonight at seven." Alex nodded at him.
"Sounds like a plan."
Leonce smiled, Maybe I'll be able to win her affections tonight.
Leonce sat lonesomely at a table at Maitre'd as his fingers drummed idly on the white cloth draped over the table. Each time he glanced down at his watch to see what time it was, it would only seem that instead of hours passing by, days passed. Alex was late for their date and Leonce knew that he wasn't going to be the only one attending it, he just couldn't be the only person to attend it.
She would never stand him up, not like this. She would have called to say that she was running late but every time Leonce looked at his watch to see that there were no new text messages or voicemails, he would begin to doubt and grow more and more angry with himself. His waiter came by and handed him a menu.
"I need two menus." Leonce remarked. The waiter, perplexed, stared at him then at the empty chair sitting across from him.
"Where is your date then?" he asked turning back to Leonce.
"Late." The waiter merely shrugged his shoulders then placed another menu in front of the empty chair and left him alone.
This is a disaster.
Alex being three hours late wasn't helping him. He had tried to distract himself by making music with his silver utensils by clanking them against his cup and doze off into space and imagine that Alex was right in front of him, holding his hand and telling him about her day and explaining why she had been running late. He even took a nap to pass the time but when he woke up, there was no one there in front of him to greet him.
He had even called her phone several times to somehow remind her about their date but each time her voicemail spoke up to greet him, he became too angry to even leave a message and in the end, hung up.
She stood me up, he thought for the umpteenth time that night.
That thought always came to his mind and yet, no matter how many times he would think that, he wasn't able to will himself to pull away from his seat.
"Sir, our restaurant is closing," the manager of the restaurant informed him. Leonce's eyes flared with anger at the news and he shot up to his feet, startling those around him and he stomped out of the restaurant in an infuriating rage.
I can't believe she would do this to me. I thought that she was different. I thought that she liked me just as much as I liked her. Why would she do this to me? This isn't like her... Maybe she didn't want to be with me. Maybe she never liked me... I thought that she was mine. I thought that we were together. I thought that I won the prize...
Author's Chapter Notes:
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Chapter End Notes:
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